Daily Tweet

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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Mon Oct 14, 2019 6:11 pm

Narcissism is a thing nowadays. I decided to confront somebody and called him out on being a narcissist. He slashed my tires. Turns out he wasn't a narcissist, he was a sociopath.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Tue Oct 15, 2019 11:53 am

I think I could teach children without going to college. I could probably do well as long as the students didn't think about reading a chapter ahead.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Tue Oct 22, 2019 11:16 pm

Computer’s down. Turns out, I’m not really a phone guy.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:48 pm

Good thing I have two cookie sheets and wanted to bake some taquitos, otherwise I would never have found my other cookie sheet.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Postby Underdog » Fri Oct 25, 2019 12:45 am

One of the consequences of cultural appropriation is that you now bake taquitos. Hot Pockets are exempt from cultural appropriation since no one knows what they are.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Sat Oct 26, 2019 12:58 am

If you folded a letter into a paper airplane, threw it across the room and it landed on a table, would you call it stationary?
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Tue Oct 29, 2019 8:10 am

Is it, “I hurt my nose and eye”? Or, “I hurt my nose and me”?
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Underdog
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Underdog » Fri Nov 01, 2019 6:47 pm

Remember when I accidentally bought whole wheat Ritz crackers? They did it to me again. I bought unsalted mixed nuts. But it backfired on them. Turns out, I liked the unsalted ones better. Take that Planters Peanuts.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Bundles
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Bundles » Mon Nov 11, 2019 12:55 pm

Did you ever notice how, when Underdog is away for a few days, someone comes along, picks up the slack in this thread, and does something with it?
If it happens, it must be possible.
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Diogenese
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Re: Daily Tweet

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Postby Diogenese » Mon Nov 11, 2019 2:53 pm

Some of us build whole websites in his honor.
A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five. :roll:

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