Daily Tweet

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Underdog
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 4:15 am

Why did I think it was, “Curtains, foiled again”, when it’s, “Curses, foiled again”?
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 4:16 am

If I could make my bedroom darker, I’d quit looking at all the stuff in it.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 4:33 am

If you go to bed at 8, you can have eight hours of sleep by 4 in the morning.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 5:01 am

When your ceiling light has two light bulbs and one burns out, how long does it take to change that light bulb?

Spoiler alert: Until the other one burns out.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 11:02 am

The Viking hat wearing Q-anon shaman... pronounce that, sham man, is no conservative. Introduce me to the Republican that eats organic because of his religious calling.
He’s got them standing on their heads trying to find a jail that will feed him.
That’s a liberal, or at least a narcissistic wacko, through and through.
And they’re looking for folks like that imbedded within our troops so they can weed them out!
Shouldn’t be too hard to find.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 11:09 am

I’m thinking about growing a ponytail. I have a long range plan. In fifteen years I’ll just all of a sudden cut it off and people will be going like, “Whoa, wow you just cut off your ponytail!” Too bad I’m balding in the back.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 3:09 pm

Underdog wrote:Why did I think it was, “Curtains, foiled again”, when it’s, “Curses, foiled again”?


In response to the bling, we used to call those Indians because they would peek from behind rocks and trees and bushes but you couldn’t see them. I don’t know what you would have to call them now.
You couldn’t count on curtains however; the lady of the house was too savvy for that. The check would never clear.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Fri Feb 05, 2021 8:50 pm

Because of the sensitive content of this post, I’m going to bury it on this page here.
I have found two products that have improved our lives in such a way, if I could buy stock and become a salesman of these products, I would.

First is the Bali Bra that’s sold at J.C. Penney. They have a style that has no buckles, snaps, wires, skinny straps; nothing to cause pain or wake you up in the night. (No I don’t wear it, she would wake me up in pain.)
The shoulder straps are wide and made of this soft, stretchy material.
The cups support surprisingly well.
Point is, I wish someone had told me before, so I’m telling you.

The second product is the BaBylissPRO FOIL FX 01.
It’s an electric shaver for women. I tried the cute pink razor, and the men’s rotary razors are all wrong.
It’s for those very stiff facial whiskers and it keeps the skin very soft. It’s too delicate for men or legs.
I found it at a professional beauty supply called Sally’s. It’s not a trimmer or clippers. It has one rotary blade not two. I think the two is for necks in hair styling.
After a while, tweezing doesn’t cut it, no pun intended.
You can literally hear the whiskers being cut until they are level with the skin. You can use it multiple times through the day without irritation.
It’s a closer result than with shave cream and a razor.

Even if it’s not for you, you might learn of someone in my situation.

You’re welcome.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Sat Feb 06, 2021 10:30 am

If you’re not part of the solution, then you settled.

Oh come on now, it’s a thinker, but it’s good!
Might be too deep, let me know.
It works on two levels.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."
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Postby Underdog » Sat Feb 06, 2021 12:02 pm

Million Dollar Idea:
Ok, did my research and Googled it. It is not available anywhere. A garage door closer.
I bought my friend an elephant for his room. He said, "Thanks." I said, "Don't mention it."

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